Lack of Discipline

So I haven't blogged in a while. I am not sure why. But I never really knew what to write about. On one hand it seems like nothing of interest has been happening and on the other hand I feel like I have been busy and haven't had the time to sit and write. But thinking about it now both of those excuses are total crap. I have had plenty of time to write but I haven't really had anything of interest to write about.

The last few days I have spent a lot of time reflecting why I have let several things "fall through." I lack discipline. It sucks to admit. And it sucks to think that I need more discipline. At the beginning of the year I wanted to practice fasting more often. I fasted once. I also wanted to read more books this year. I have started about a dozen books and have finished one. I am great at starting projects but not great at finishing them. I do not like delayed gratification. It takes too long to see results. I like short term goals. I like instant gratification. I don't have many long term goals. I don't think this is necessarily a bad thing but it can't be good.

The lack of this blog is a result of my lack of discipline.

Colorado Move

Last Friday the entire Butler clan (all pets included) loaded up into three vehicles and moved Momma Butler to Colorado. It was a long 2 day drive, two flat tires, many stops to let the dogs out of the cars, but we made it. For a few years my family has been praying that my mom will be able to return to Colorado. It has been amazing watching God plan this move. Things fell into place very nicely with His timing. It will be weird not having my mom close by, but I know it will be good for her to be in Colorado and soon for her to begin a new journey of her life with her new husband. Lately people have been asking me what us kids think about our mom getting remarried. I think it is a transition, and yes, there are and will be weird moments. I also think that the Butler kids have gone through some tough times and our mom getting remarried wont be one of those difficult times. It will just be different. I realize that I don't really know this man that plans to marry my mom. But I do know that she is happy. And that is all that I could ask for her.

I will miss my mom. I will miss having the dogs, cats and horses close by. But I will enjoy spending time in Colorado when I get to visit.

On a different note, I have really been enjoying running. I usually just appreciate the sense of accomplishment at the end of a run. I don't really like running itself. But today when I woke up I was exciting to get to the gym to do my four miles! (I think this is because last weeks 4 miles was a great experience.) I was looking forward to making my body work. Sure, there were still times that I wanted to stop and be done. Yes, I did walk some of the time. But I still did it. I was able to get four more miles done. I will be really happy when four miles starts to feel like one mile. I am still excited for the half marathon. I still doubt myself a little that I will actually be able to do it. But everyday I feel my body getting stronger. I figure that is a good thing :)

(I wanted to post some pictures of Colorado, but I haven't figures out how to do that yet. Maybe some other time!)